depression.

I struggled silently with depression growing up, finding faith helped me a lot, not that I didn't still have waves of it from time to time. When I lost my sister, I dealt with it hard again. Moved to Atlanta, uprooted my life to all new experiences then. Since moving here, it has been an all around similar and challenging experience, the waves of depression have come back at full force, I have had some great encouragers around me, but as much as people are a huge source of happiness for me I know that I have to find it in myself and not expect to depend on others for that. Mental health is a tough one, it truly has a mind of its own, because of that I have decided to seek counseling, I say this to hopefully encourage others while I walk through this myself, sometimes you need help. If its pride, denial or guilt and shame, its always best to bring yourself to light and find healing. I'm definitely not a victim. I don’t want pity. I don’t use it as an excuse but it sometimes is a reason I avoid social events or whatnot…I just have this "annoying cough" that I can't shake and look forward to be able to breathe clear soon.

The important thing with depression is that it doesn't have to get to the point that you aren’t getting out of bed or you are questioning your life, it is important to acknowledge the struggle before it gets to that point.

There will also be those that diagnose you and tell you what to do to fix it. Like dating, you need to wait 2 days before responding then he will keep pursuing you. I think you have to try and dig inside and find what is right for you. Counseling is a good first step for sure, I have been dabbling with CBD and that has seemed to help a bit. My mom encourages me to use essential oils, I try it. Exercise and nutrition is essential. I have recently been advised to try a supplement, 5HTP. Its natural in which I prefer to go the homeopathic route, but for some medicine is necessary. The most important thing is that you try.

Below is a song that has helped me as I try and meditate on higher things and seek happiness.